Waiting for a sign

Now, more than ever in my life, I feel the need to have control over everything (I have some OCD tendencies in some areas in my life) and to receive instant gratification for any hard work that I complete. Where is this coming from? Not sure, but maybe it's the realization that I've now been on the Earth for 23 years and am still waiting for my life to come together as I've always envisioned it. In other words I want to wake up in an old,cozy house with an exciting job to go to, and a loving husband to come home to after work. Isn't that what I'm supposed to be doing in my life? Maybe. But maybe not yet. Key word = yet; meaning now isn't the proper time to have all of those things in my life. Not at this very moment.

However, I fully believe that I'm on the right track to one day living a life filled with all of these blessings. I know this because of all the blessings that I already have in my life. None of them too small; yet, none of them too big. My blessings are just right for me. How do I know? Because God knows my heart and knows what I need in life at this moment and at every moment. While society may call some of these blessings "givens", I'm realizing more and more each day that there are no "givens" in life because things can change so easily and even some can be taken away completely.

Here are my blessings:
promises- that God loves me and has a place saved for me in Heaven
faith- that I'm saved my His grace and that He will never leave me
Holy Spirit- for speaking to me and continuing to reveal itself to me in amazing ways
family- one consisting of a vast amount of people who truly care about and love me
home- a structure filled with more memories than can be counted and the place that I'll never get tired of coming to
a job- I really do love the kids in my class and have so much fun getting to share my heart with them. Who knew that 20 four year old's could steal your heart after only 4 weeks?
opportunities- to meet people, learn new things, travel, experience new things, and the chance to make each day a little more exciting
josh- for love, friendship, fun, laughter, comfort, understanding, excitement, thoughtfulness, and for the indescribable feeling that I have in my heart every time I see/talk to him
friends-people who take time to talk to me, listen to me, really get to know me, and who I always have fun with

I was just talking to Josh about all of this, and he said something along the lines of "sometimes you just have to wait for the right signs for certain things to happen and fall into place". (If you know Josh then you probably know that he laughs a lot and doesn't ever have too much to say. However, when we turn off the tv and laptop and just look at each other to talk, he reveals so many ideas and thoughts that make me think a little deeper.) Now going back to the signs thing... I've seen plenty of signs before... What do you think that bright little sticker saying "sale" on the only pair of cute 6 1/2 size shoes on the rack of Macy's was? Duh, a sign that I needed to buy them. And what about when I passed three Starbucks this morning on the way to my training seminar? A coincidence? Duh, it was a sign that I needed to pull into the next one and order a tall no-whip mocha. (I mean, I had an extra 30 minutes to kill before my training started anyway.)

As much as I love these "signs", I know that there's a bigger, more important sign that guides my life: The Holy Spirit. This is what Josh was talking about. While I'm complaining and worrying about the things that I have not yet achieved or received, the Holy Spirit is busy preparing my heart for these blessings to come into my life. This is actually the only sign that I should be worried about seeing and it turns out that I should be less concerned with seeing it than with feeling it. So, I have to constantly keep myself in check to make sure that I'm on track with God to one day to receive the blessings that He so lovingly and generously offers.The great thing about this sign is that even though every Christian is waiting on it,  you don't have to wait in line because it's simultaneously preparing the heart of every Christian for the true glory of God.

Are you waiting on your sign?

Just what you've been waiting for...

I suppose it's time to fill you ( meaning ALL of you many viewers who anxiously await updates from this blog) in on the underlying meaning and enthusiasm that prompted me to even start another blog and name it Chapter 23. If you know me at all then you've probably convinced yourself that you've already discovered the meaning just by the pure fact that you know how old I am. Yes, I am 23 years old... Congrats to you if you thought of this! However, this fact might just be pure coincidence or rather the inner revelations of my mind. I just started thinking about numbers since I was having trouble unearthing a catchy phrase that would appropriately encompass my life at this ("this" meaning a a time coming from about a month ago) moment. While I've always been drawn to the number 15, I felt as thought it might be too common or low of a number for this grand project. 23 may have been weighing heavily on my mind from my recent celebration of birth in May upon which I marked my 23rd year or maybe because I have recited the 23rd Psalm to myself just before I go to sleep ever since I memorized it over ten years ago. This series of verses is well-known to most Christians and has always given me a sense of peace and comfort just before drifting off to sleep and in any instance that I feel uncomfortable or scared (most of which, coincidentally, happen while I'm laying in bed before drifting off to sleep). These words spoken by David remind me that I am never alone and that God is with me at all times. Who doesn't want eternal companionship and safety?

"The Lord is my Sheperd; I shall not want. 

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:

He leadeth me beside the still waters. 

He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. 

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil: 

for thou art with me: thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies:

Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. 

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life:

and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever. "

Psalms 23

Perhaps I'm trying to make my 23rd Chapter in life just as meaningful as the 23rd Chapter of Pslams. Perhaps I just want to find some way to justify my mediocre life in the eyes of myself, my family, friends, communtity, and most importantly my Savior and my God. Perhaps I think this blog will serve as an outlet for myself or, in better circumstances, an inlet to the Holy Spirit. Perhaps some posts will be pointless. Some will be fun. Some will be long and boring. Some will be nothing that you expected, but everything you wanted to know. And, perhaps, some will help you and I uncover the essence of Chapter 23. 

I realize that this post could have already knocked out the "long and boring" part, so to liven things up a bit I'll leave you with some pictures of a recent Saturday hiking trip with Josh to Suwanee Mountain. This is my attempt to jazz up that mediocre life that I mentioned previously. Thankfully, it's also a good form of exercise, has provided some bonding time for Josh and I, and has given me a chance to explore Georgia since I've recently discovered that I don't really even know that much about my home state.

It was on a Tuesday somebody touched me...

Revival: 1.) a renewed attention to or interest in something, 2.) an often highly emotional evangelistic meeting or series of meetings

This is some of what Webster's has to say about revival. Actually, these two definitions fit the revival that's going on this week at Rock Springs Baptist quite nicely. Revival, to me, has always a designated week during the year that is filled with going to/from church, praying, singing, visiting, fellow-shipping, preaching, and seeing people saved. To be honest I'm really not so sure that it ever meant much more than that up until about 12 years ago.

On a Tuesday night during summer revival I got a hold of the one thing that makes a revival happen and thrive. I got the Holy Spirit and the gift of salvation. Not just a gift, the gift. The only gift that truly holds any value in this world. The greatest gift of all. My gift. Sure, lots of people have received this amazing gift, but none are exactly the same as mine. The most special thing about this FREE gift is that it's only enough for me; I can't give any of it to anyone else because God designed it to just be enough for one individual. Don't worry though, God isn't stingy with his gift-giving. He set aside enough individual doses of the salvation for each and every human being on Earth and those to come. He created this world with me and and you in mind and was keeping me and you in mind when he sent His only Son to die on a rugged cross so that me and you could call Heaven our home after our life on Earth is finished. Pretty amazing, huh?

You see, God offered the gift of salvation to me and I accepted it. There wasn't any bargaining, money transactions, or time spent setting up a payment schedule. Remember, I said this gift from God was a FREE gift. All I did was claim Jesus as my Savior and put my trust and faith in God that He would one day make a home on Heaven for me. The great thing about this gift is that it never runs out or has to be returned, instead, it only seems to get better and better as I grow older. I just can't get over the fact that God loves me so much and wants to be with me at all times. He's truly an amazing God and values His relationship with each of His children.

Today revival means so much more than just going to church 14 times during the week, singing song after song after song, and hearing sermons from many preachers. Revival means that I can go back to that Tuesday night almost 12 years and know without a doubt that God still loves me and is still promising a home in Heaven for me when my body dies. It's a time for me to draw closer to my Lord and renew my spirit that so often gets beat down in this world. And, one of the most exciting and worthwhile times during revival is the opportunity to welcome new members of the family of Christ into the fold; to see someone saved is probably the most miraculous, happy, uplifting, and feel-good-to-the-soul moments that can be experienced in this life, and I'm thankful to have had two of these moments during this week's revival and confident that God has much more in store for the remaining services.

Just like the song says, "It was on a Tuesday somebody touched me; It must have been the hand of the Lord!"... what was your day?

Just add it to your wish list...

I've been in a bit of a nesting mood for the past few weeks which has led me spend countless hours of my down time digging through my closet, cleaning out drawers, and unloading packed shelves. To some this may seem like a tedious task or perhaps just a headache, but for me its fun and most often leads to a therapeutic session with an ample time for reminiscing, soul searching, and unloading burdens.

While I do love organizing, relocating, and sometimes parting ways with gifts, treasures, and junk that I've stored for too long, I love looking for new items to fill the newly available voids in my closet, drawers and on the shelves. Thankfully, I tend to do more "window shopping" than actually purchasing which my bank account thanks me for often. The term "window shopping" might provoke your mind to think of a sidewalk along a highly known street that holds the box numbers to some of the most exquisite, ritzy stores known to man, but that's not my kind of  "shopping without buying" scene. No, not even close. You'll only be smelling musk and wiping the dust off your hands in my favorite shopping locations which you can often be led to with the help of only a poster board, permanent marker, and a wooden stake. Don't act like you've ever been driving anywhere on a Saturday morning and NOT seen those neon posters in the grass that proudly proclaim "BARGAIN" in bold letters spelling out... Y A R D  S A L E!

Yard sales are the one place you can go to find everything and anything that you ever or never wanted. You know that coined phrase from Forrest Gump that goes like "Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're gonna get"? Well, I say "Life is like a yard sale; you never know what you're gonna get". The fun part of the yard sale is that there are new things, old things, broken things, and, well, things that you can't even identify. If you don't see what you're looking for you can't just waltz up to the owner and ask to see this season's catalog and order the item you've been looking for, instead, you have to substitute it for some other quality item at this yard sale or go on to the next one to see what they have to offer. Furniture has become the "treasure" that I'm drawn to at yard sales, antique shops, and second-hand stores. However, I don't exactly have a "need" for furiniture at this particualr moment, but hey, what's wrong with looking.

This brings me to the point that I can't just subscribe online to a yard sale and create a wish list of all the things I hope to buy one day. It just doesn't work that way. I suppose I'll just have to settle with the yard sale wish list I have in my head.

Why?

Living an exceptionally exciting life? No. Far away from most relatives and friends? No. Promoting a business, hobby, or craft? No.

All of these might lead or obligate someone to create a blog that's open to the entire electronic world and population, but this is not the case for me. My life is not overly exciting at the moment, my family members (with the exception of just a few key people) are located in Georgia within about a 20 mile radius of each other, and I'm not in the process of starting a small business with the hopes of selling some unique, easy to manufacture, over-priced good. (However, I AM currently unemployed, so if you have an idea for a unique, easy to manufacture, over-priced good please send me an email,  and I'll start working on another blog to showcase my new business endeavor.)

Now, back to what DID prompt the creation of this blog... I've basically found myself thinking "this would make a good blog post" too many times in past couple months. I got on a pretty good schedule of blogging, journaling, soul-searching, making a cry to the world, or whatever you choose to call it during my time in Belize and have missed my time thinking, writing, and documenting memories and nonsense in the hopes that one day I'll look back on my entries and reminisce about the exceptional, awful, life-changing, or ordinary days of my young adulthood.  I've been inspired to write more frequently through the numerous blogs that I follow or just come across on a daily basis. And let's face it, Facebook stalking seems a little too last-year and time-consuming when there are much more entertaining, creative things to see on people's blogs.

So, here it is. A new opportunity for you to fill the useless hours during your day at work or in class. You're welcome! I promise to keep you away from doing anything productive as much as possible. And, let me remind you that the "comment" section below isn't there to fill up empty space, but for you to use to waste away even more hours of the day. Now that we've gotten that settled... Ready? Go!